What Goes Up Must Come Down
by believeinsherlock221B
Summary: Sherlock realizes his feelings for John and begins to distance himself so that when John inevitably leaves him, it won't hurt as badly. He's in for quite a surprise when John figures out what he's trying to do.
1. Chapter 1

It was all going to come to an end soon. He could see it now.

No one stayed for long. His father had left him, followed quickly by his grandmother. The only friend he had had in primary school had left him when he realized it wasn't 'cool' to be his friend. His own mother could barely stand to keep him for the socially acceptable eighteen years. Which is why he had left home at seventeen.

Before now he was always the one to leave first, if he even happened to get close to someone in the first place.

He left his mother. He left his first boyfriend in university. He left his second boyfriend and left university.

He constantly walked away from his brother so that his brother could not walk away first.

He kept the two people who seemed to care for him at a distance.

But this time was different. He had not seen it coming; he had not noticed his developing feelings until it was too late.

This time he could not walk away, he would just have to prepare himself for the day that he was left alone.

He knew it was coming.

The past year had been so wonderful. Too good to be true. It couldn't last.

Because what goes up, must come down.


	2. Chapter 2

Sherlock rushed out of the apartment, and John was pretty sure he would have been left out if he had not followed him. Sherlock was sliding into the cab and was about to shut the door when he saw John. The Doctor clambered hurriedly into the back, and off they went. The consulting detective said nothing the entire ride, barely even glancing at John. It was almost as if he were trying t pretend John wasn't there, but John put it down as Sherlock going into 'case mode' and tried to ignore the sting that being ignored brought about.

Nothing changed at the crime scene. Normally Sherlock would consult him on the state of the body, or test his observational skills. Today Sherlock ignored him completely, prompting strange looks from Donovan and Anderson and a sympathetic one from Lestrade.

"You and the Freak have a lover's spat?" Donovan asked, breaking the uncomfortable silence.

Without looking away from the body Sherlock responded, "We, like everyone else, do not want you in our business. Keep your mouth shut or leave. And if you do leave, take Anderson with you. He's trying to think again."

Donovan rolled her eyes and Anderson spluttered angrily, but no one said anything else while Sherlock finished his investigation of the crime scene.

"The brother did it, he was angry that his sister received more from their parents' will. He is staying in a hotel down the street, on the third floor. You should hurry, he will attempt to flee the city in under an hour." With that said, Sherlock walked out.

John followed him, "Sherlock, would you like to have dinner now?"

He had to ask the question again because the consulting detective either hadn't heard him, or really was ignoring him. Finally Sherlock slowed his pace and turned pack to John. "No, I'm not hungry."

Normally to match Sherlock's stride John had to take two steps for every one of his. Now Sherlock was walking abnormally fast and John simply could not keep pace. He gave up after a block and a half and lagged behind.

John could not fathom what he had done to make Sherlock treat him like this. They hadn't fought in days. Hell, just yesterday they had been laughing at bad telly together and now Sherlock wouldn't even look at him.

Sighing he stopped into the Tesco that was around the block from the apartment. He might as well get some milk and a few other groceries while he was out. Maybe Sherlock's blood sugar was low and John was going to have to force him to eat.

It wouldn't be the first time.


	3. Chapter 3

When John finally made it home Sherlock was nowhere to be found. The doctor sighed and began putting away the groceries.

After that was finished he began making dinner for the both of them. Before living with Sherlock, John had never been particularly domestic. Though he supposed that if he had stayed that way, he and Sherlock would have starved and 221B Baker Street would have been condemned.

John didn't mind making dinner and picking up around the apartment. He knew it wasn't Sherlock's thing, and while sometimes he became exasperated with the detective, in the end he still loved all of his quirks.

Dinner was ready when Sherlock walked in. The water had just come to a boil, so John set about making them both a cuppa. "Where have you been?" He asked, as he made his way into the living room and set the cup down beside the detective.

"Out." Was his short reply. John had expected at least some elaboration, but Sherlock didn't looked like he was inclined to give any.

"I made dinner, stir fry."

Normally, after he said this, the detective would follow him into the kitchen and they would sit down for dinner. Today he didn't even look up.

John looked at him exasperatedly, "Have I done something that would warrant you ignoring me?"

"No."

"Then why are you?"

"I'm not."

"You've barely spoken to me or looked at me all day."

"I'm busy."

John almost yelled in frustration but all he did was let out a huff. "Fine, dinner's on the stove. I'm going out for a bit, hopefully when I get back you'll have stopped being such a git."

He slammed the door on the way out, but didn't make it far. Ms. Hudson came out into the hallway, "Have a little domestic?"

"Yeah, Sherlock is being a git."

Ms. Hudson ushered him into her apartment and sat him down in the chair across from hers. He could hear her bustling around the kitchen making two cups of tea. When she reentered John thanked her for her tea.

"When Sherlock was very young no one really knew how to act around him. He's always been the brilliant thing he is now, back then though he didn't understand that the observations he made could hurt people. Now he does understand, he's just given up caring. His father and grandmother understood how to talk to him. They cared for him when his mother couldn't handle him any more. When Sherlock was eleven his father died, and his grandmother died the following year. After that he and his mother grew farther apart and he left home at seventeen, because he felt like she didn't care about him.

"I'm not sure if you're aware, but Sherlock has been in a relationship before."

John wasn't completely surprised; Sherlock had been particularly proficient at the physical aspect of their relationship. But he had never mentioned being in a relationship before.

"Yes, he had two boyfriends in university. Of course, he never cared for them the way he cares for you, but they still existed. Sherlock left them both, when he felt himself getting attached. After the second one, he dropped out of university."

John considered interrupting to ask how she knew all of this, but then he couldn't really remember how long they were supposed to have known each other in the first place. So he nodded to show he was paying attention and she continued.

"Before you came around there were only three people who cared about Sherlock. His brother, the detective inspector and myself. He never lets us get close to him, though. I suspect it's because he's scared he'll find we don't really care for him. Right now he's scared because he knows he can't leave you so he is treating you badly so that you'll leave him."

"I would never leave him."

Ms. Hudson smiled softly at him, "I know, dear. But Sherlock let himself care about another person in a long time, and he's scared that it will be ruin him now."

John sat silently for a few moments, taking all of this in. Sherlock had never mentioned his parents, or grandmother, or the two boys in university. It's not that he's surprised or hurt; Sherlock just didn't about his family. But he was a bit shocked that Sherlock thought John would leave him.

"So I just have to prove to him I'm not going to leave?" Ms. Hudson nodded, "Well that's easier said than done."


End file.
